Wednesday

I'm not sure what to write really this morning i updated my information for the alumni information oh yay. My husband should be getting up to get ready for his dentist appointment and i've got to get Sammy bear up and ready for the sitters. Money is tight right now and my main problem is that adding two more days of 11-2 is only going to put me right where i'm at right now i did the math when i was on break and found out i would only have a couple more dollars then what i do now which won't help any because what i pay to the sitter will go up too so i have to make sure it's worth it. Granted it's better paying the sitter i have because she is reasonable very reasonablee compared to taking my kids to public daycare where they charge an arm and two legs at least if not two arms and two legs. I wish my husband were out of school already but then there are times i don't wish that mainly because my husband has goofy dreams of moving to france or some other god forsaken planet..now i suppose there are a few places i could probably get use too although i'm not sure especially with my mom in the condition she is in with her alztimers i never know when i will get a call saying " can you come and calm your mother down." or the call that she is in the hospital or something like that so i need to be here for now. I suppose i wouldn't mind living in california although it's terribly expensive there plus they are having worse finatial problems there then in iowa but only because my sister lives out there and if we could live somewhere close to my sister and her husband. The other place is in Missori and only because my SIL lives there but really i would rather stay in Iowa live in around Cedar Rapids or DesMoines or Iowa City. Iowa City would be good because they have GREAT medical care up there. Ok i've rambled enough i need to switch sides of the street with my van and get the kiddo ready for the sitter.. take care all and have a GREAT day!

Sam's Better & Other Things

Sam is better i think no temperature today for the past 2 days he has been running 102.2 temp and they found nothing they did strep culture,checked the ears,checked for the flu even though he had the flu shot, drew blood to check for bacteria in his blood and took a chest xray and all that came back ok so it appears it is just viral and that he is mostly over it today. Zac will be starting kindergarten in the fall and i'm not ready for that he is mostly potty trained but still has trouble with the pooping issues this is what i get all the time from him " i don't know how to go poop mommy" ok this boggles me seriously how can you not know how to go poop and if he truely doesn't know how to do this how do i show him ? I don't really want to take him into the bathroom when i have to go although that has been suggested by the nurse at his preschool.I don't feel comfortable with th is.
Brian: well i have alot of problems with him he isn't in school right now although i think he seriously wants to go to school but i think he has alot of anxiety issues and depression issues. He is on Seroquel which is an antipyscotic-antidepressent and believe me the medicine does help it's better then nothing but it still isn't kicking the depression or anxiety he has. My husband is on him to get a job i don't think he is ready for this although i do think he could do a lobby position somewhere or a bus-boy position where he cleans up tables and wipes them down,takes out trash and fills condiments and stuff, but he needs afternoon or evening not morning. Still waiting on the SSI thing since he is 18 they have to do an adult determination on whether he gets it or not.. He has had SSI for several years probably like about 4 years i didn't apply before that because i didn't want to keep him from entering into the service if he wanted too but they really don't want him in there with all his disablities anyways. I'm an enablerer as Brian's worker Doug calls me lol i know this it is something that i have a hard time dealing with because he is old enough to know he has to take his pills or he has to do his chores without me nagging at him it would make my life that much easier and my stress would probably go down ten fold. what i really need to do is write down what i need to do to make myself better.Anyways need to get the little guy up and ready for the sitters and get me ready for work. Take Care All

My Friday

Thank god today is my friday my last day at work for the week we are suppose to get hit really hard with a bad snow/ice storm today but it doesn't start til noon and supposidly ends tonight at 9pm. I was so mad earlier i was turning into Hardees when i saw the ambulence coming up behind me so i was trying to get out of the way but the oncoming traffic saw the ambulence and wouldn't let me get turned so i could get out of the way grrrr people are SOOO rude i usually think what if that ambulence was going to somebody i know's house my family or friends so i try to get out of their way post haste.Then i was going straight and should have had the right away but somebody turned in front of me and the light turned red like i said people are so rude today i can almost see how it's going to go at work today i work with the public people are going to be so grouchy and rude to us and we are ONLY trying to do our jobs and make sure their orders are right if we don't understand something they say to us our job is to try to understand it by asking questions.Anyways i have to jet and get ready wonder what the day will hold most of our night crew and a couple of our day crew live out of town and the storm is suppose to hit by noon. So i guess we will see what happens. take care all and Merry Christmas!

Where to Start...

I'm not sure even where to start it's been awhile since i last wrote. Things have been very stressful here at home with Brian not being in school right now we had a meeting a few weeks ago and they gave us our options the first one being that we could cut his days in half and he could go half days in the afternoons but he would have to take summer school and night school probably just to get enough credits to graduate, he is missing like 12 credits it takes 22 to graduate. Option B was he could just drop out and get his GED this is the one they pushed on they didn't push for him to stay in school drop his hours down for awhile and then try and bring them back up no they pushed for him to drop out and get his GED which i knew he wouldn't be able to get your talking about a kid that has been in BD Classrooms his whole life basically except for highschool and even then he had alot of special ed classes his main ones were Life Skills & Consumer Math which is just basic math he learned how to budget and balence a checkbook hopefully anyways. He should be able to shop for grocerys and get good bargins. He can't do Geometry or Algebra i'm not even sure where his math level was in 6th grade he ranged from 1st-3rd grade in things like Math,Reading,and other things. I know his reading level right now is about 8th -10th grade any higher then that and he has trouble comprehending i'm pretty sure he could read a Harry Potter book, probably the newspaper now whether or not he could comprehend what was being said in the newspaper is another thing. So the GED people said this was not really an appropriate route for him they have calls into an associate principal and a special ed teacher to try to brainstorm hopefully what we could do to help brian get an education that he truely does want. What makes it difficult is all the medicines that he takes on most all his medicines one of the side effects is being drowsy having trouble waking up and believe you me sometimes it takes me about 2 hours to wake him up and this is if he hasn't been up in the middle of the night because he can't sleep and he takes medicine to help him sleep lot of good that does him. I need to get him up to Iowa City to have them go over his medicines and give him a good going over and that is another story. The other thing the GED teachers told me was that the Govenor of Iowa put some lady on the Board of Education and if necessary we can talk to her to hopefully get something done for Brian.He is also still on a waiting list for supervised living with cirsi (sp) . Now on to why we can't do the Iowa City thing yet my van took a MAJOR dump on me and the water pump is bad it would cost us $600 to fix it and that is a used one too i guess and we are still having troubles with the brakes about every 2 weeks my back breaks need bled and they don't know what is wrong with that. So the head of the shop basically said that we shouldn't put $600 dollars into the van because it wasn't worth it and that we should probably go shopping for another vehical would be better. He didn't charge us for that appt but had he charged us it probably would have been over $100 again so far i think we have probably put into the van since Aug like $600 possibly or more. We could have bought or paid a down payment for another decent vehical with that money and the money we saved not getting another water pump put in. So hopefully in the next 2 weeks i will have another decent vehical, he said i can still drive the van but we're having to put antifreeze into it everyday or so usually i have to put some in every day and by tomorrow i will probably need more antifreeze which premixed is $8 for the cheapest that we have found so far. To top off a great ending yesterday Brian decided to go out and do some yardwork which is fine, it's great actually but he didn't put on any shoes and socks before he went out and he was chopping some wood to through into our burning pile which eventually will get burned one of these days and he missed and hit his foot i went to check on him and found him on the ground i just about freaked i could barely keep myself calm i got him to the ER and they cleaned his foot and found the cut not to be too severe he had a cut on top of his 3rd toe and a cut between the 3rd and 4th toe he was so lucky he didn't loose his toes or foot. I think my hair is actually whiter now because of him. So needless to say i'm taking the Axe and having my step-dad lock it up over at his house so brian won 't have access to it. I know he is almost 18 yrs old and i know i can't protect him from everything but damn it he scared about 100 lives out of me with that. He told me he was never going to touch it again and when i talked to him about why we wear shoes outside when we do yard work or are outside at all i think he FINALLY understands why i've said wear your shoes,wear your shoes do you have your shoes on i feel like a broken record.. We were in the ER for 3 1/2 hours and he ended up with 5 stitches... thank god that was it he really has a guardian angel looking out for him.
Sam and Zac were so good durning the whole time at the ER.. They gave the boys some grahm crackers and apple juice because they were getting so hungrey it was about 7:30pm by the time we got home.So i'm going to try and force myself to do laundry today and help Brian clean his foot off and re bandage it to keep it clean and i'm going to try to relax and not stress today.. That will be a MAJOR accomplishment for me...
So now how was your guy's week????
take care and may God watch over you and yours!

Back Again

I have 3 boys my oldest and biggest pain is Brian don't get me wrong i love him dearly but with all his problems he has he is definatly my biggest challenge. He will be 18 in October i'm trying my darndest to get him into supervised living. Zac my middle son will be 5 in May and will start Kindergarden in the fall of 2009 i can't believe that he will be in kindergarden it just blows my mind. Sam the youngest will be 2 in November. We just found out that my mother has Alztimers begining stages of it and so i'm trying to cope with that and be there for her and help her when she needs it. She also has diabetes and MS (mulitple schlrosis) she has lived through a stroke and a brain bleed,she is an AMAZING woman.

New here

Mom to THREE boys 17 yrs old almost 18 ,4 yrs old and almost 2 yrs old i'm a partial SAHM and i work 3 days a week as well. My husband goes to school and has 2 yrs left i hope. I'm going to try and use this to update on my son's and other things of intrest or value in my life.. Take care all.